So, the Super Mario Bros. movie was complete trash; you know, I know this. Pretty much anyone who has laid eyes on that God-awful piece of crap will agree that the ball was dropped pretty big on what could have been an enjoyable movie, instead of what is now a permanent smudge on the resume of industry greats Bob Haskins and Dennis Hopper. Nintendo entrusted one of its most beloved franchises to Hollywood who in turn took a big ol' dump all over it.
While the memory of SMB: The Movie lingers in our minds whenever word of another game-to-movie adaptation is released or announced, Hollywood, to its credit, has done some good things when it comes to bringing gaming's iconic franchises to the silver screen (unless of course Uwe Boll is attached to the project, and in that case you might as well just set your money on fire). Mortal Kombat wasn't half bad, as was the original Tomb Raider flick. Resident Evil seems to be going strong regardless of being nothing but mindless action fare. And Silent Hill (no, not the crappy 3D sequel) was a visual masterpiece…despite being a complete narrative mess. With that being said, maybe its high time Nintendo allowed Hollywood to make movies out of its intellectual properties once again.
5) EarthBound: An RRG with a massive cult following, EarthBound is often regarded as one of the greatest titles ever released on the Super Nintendo Entertainment System who's popularity has only risen due to protagonist Ness' consistent appearance throughout the Super Smash Bros. franchise. With an absurd yet dark tale and memorable cast of characters, EarthBound's story is one that begs to made into a CGI film. Seriously, who among us wouldn't want to see lovable lunatic Porky tearing it up alongside embodiment of evil extraordinaire Giygas. Pixar, you better get on this. Well, either you or those Wreck-It Ralph guys.
4) Pokemon: Okay, now before you all jump all over me on this one, hear me out. Yes, I know that over the years there have been a decent amount of animated Pokemon films over the last two decades. But I really think it's time for the series to go live-action. Imagine something along the lines of Avatar's CGI/live-action combination and you can start to see that this might not be a bad thing…just make sure you keep M. Night Shyamalan as far away from it as possible. Pokemon has become insanely popular over the last twenty years and with the announcement of 3Ds title Pokemon X/Y the series has no apparent end in sight. So a big-time Hollywood film might just be the way to celebrate such an integral cog in the young gamer machine.
3) Super Smash Bros.: Okay, just try to stay with me on this one before you dismiss it entirely. SSB's absurd storyline aside, wouldn’t it be amazing Nintendo's super-est of superstars come together to battle it out in one massive, over-the-top feature film? Perhaps a Space Jam-type setup where somebody famous and trending gets sucked into the magical world of Nintendo and must rally the forces of NintedoLand (there's your Wii U tie-in right there, thank you very much) against the diabolical forces of Master Hand! Stupid idea? Eh, probably…but I'd still pay to see it.
2) Super Mario Bros.: Just hit the reset button on the memory of the 1993 failure. Let's get real. The landscape of Mario and his adventures has changed A LOT over the last twenty years: homeboy's been to a goop-ridden vacation island, to space, and he's even gone all Innerspace-style inside of Bowser himself. And speaking of the big bad King Koopa, Mario's adversaries have changed throughout the years as well. Sure, it always comes back around to Bowser but with the likes of Wario, Fawful, Dimentio, and the Shadow Queen, screenwriters now have a much broader and colorful range of characters to build a story around. Now is the time to right the wrongs of the past. I cast my vote for Joss Whedon to take on this challenge as I am sure he possesses the necessary skills to write/direct an adaption not entirely made of suck. Not to mention that he'd probably do a damn fine job of incorporating all the outfits Mario has donned over the years.
1) The Legend of Zelda: Simply put, this just needs to happen. When I think LoZ as a major-motion picture, I imagine a massive, Lords of the Rings-like epic. Peter Jackson could very well do incredible things with the Hero of Time what with Hyrule's fantastical setting of fairies, large-scale beasts, chickens just waiting to be kicked around. Could you imagine what this would even begin to look like? Well, probably a lot like this…so, yeah; it just has to happen. I'm not opposed to the whole trilogy thing that Peter Jackson is so fond about either; honestly, a movie about the quest for each of the three pieces of the Triforce sounds a lot more reasonable than a three-part movie series based on a 300-page book.
So there you have it. My pitches may not be the best in the world, but I'm sure you all have something to say about that, don't you? So sound off in the comments section and let us know which Nintendo franchises you think should make this list.